Indulge me. This is not a post about baking, but I wanted to share something, and this seemed like a good place. This is my personal experience, and I do not for a moment intend to preach.
Today, I am one year sober. I am actually not that keen on the term 'sober' - it kind of implies that prior to a year ago I was drunk as a newt the whole time, but what I really mean is that I haven't had an alcoholic drink for 365 days (actually - 366. Leap year and all that!). And I just want to say "well done me".
When I tell people that I don't drink, there is often an assumption that I must previously have had a real problem with alcohol. I have never been alcohol dependent, but I did come to recognise that alcohol was becoming a problem for me. Where as it used to be fun, a way to relax and kick back, a lubricant to loosen tongues and enjoy time with friends, it became for me a substance that brought with it periods of almost crippling anxiety, a conviction that I had made a fool of myself and offended everyone I was with and something that wasted many a weekend morning as I wallowed in self-hatred and self-inflicted shame.
I didn't drink every day. I wouldn't drink in the week, and I wouldn't even drink every weekend, but when I did have a drink, I would invariably drink too much. I could easily have none, but once I had one, it would never stop there. Moderation just didn't work for me - I have always been an all-or-nothing kind of a girl, and it's too late to change me now! So I decided to just quit, and I can honestly say I have never looked back. The Sunday morning 'hangxiety' has gone and my confidence in social situations has returned. I have more energy and don't waste any time on hangovers and brain fog mornings. I remember everything about a night out, and I trust my judgement more. I don't think I would have had the same energy and confidence to start Wendy Bakes if my weekends were still impacted by the excesses of an accidentally-over-indulgent Friday night!
Don't get me wrong, this is not a sermon on the inherent evils of drink. Me and alcohol did have some fun! There were some good times, and definitely some drunken escapades which I would not have indulged in sober, the memories of which I will cherish forever. But I've outgrown the relationship and its time to say goodbye to that particular old friend.
In a society which expects us to drink, even when alcohol no longer serves us well, I am proud of my sober year and look forward to the on-going adventures which my clear head will bring.
Now I'll put my soap box away, and get back to my cake stands. x